I´m not good when it comes to writing new posts .
I hope you all had a good Christmas holiday and I wish everybody a very happy New Year 2012.
I have intended to write but was to busy / tired caring for our little miracle baby Simon that was born on the 26 th of November 2011.
I am so happy to be able to write such a wonderful , positive post .
So happy and grateful to have been blessed with this miracle.
The last two years when going through so much heartbreak , sometimes I wasnt sure if we were ever going to have a child ,some days I tried to prepare myself for a life without children .
I was so happy when I got pregnant again , for the 3 rd time , but I was guarding my heart , I was so afraid of another heartbreak.
I lived one day at a time and the weeks passed and my belly grew and the baby seemed to be fine and healthy on each checkup .
I saw myself on photographs with a big , pregnant belly but somehow found it hard to believe it was me on that photo.....
I tried both to embrace this pregnancy AND guard my heart so much of my pregnancy seems like a dream to me .....its sounds strange doesnt it ?
Now I have this beautiful little baby boy at home and many times I have to pinch myself to understand that he is real , he is here with us , he looks at me , breaths , I am nursing him and holding him so close to my body , skin to skin , I can feel the heat from his little body and feel and hear every breath he takes .
Its a miracle to see his little eyes looking at me .
To look at him , his little hands , beautiful little face and blue eyes with long eyelashes brings tears to my eyes , I can sit and watch him forever ; )
I am so grateful and happy to be able to experience this .
It is worth all the unglamorous sides of parenting which do exist of course , I want to be honnest ; )
But I am ready to give up myself for a while for this little boy and I know he will grow fast and this time will pass so fast ( he is soon 6 weeks )
I am able to breast feed him but I can see how its hard to make it work as you have to give so much of your time in order to nurse a baby when he wants it .It is hard at times but I am getting better at it and I am slowly getting into a routine so that I can have a few hours for myself too : ) going out for walks makes him sleep long : )
I have lost most of the weight put on during the pregnancy but still have about 5-6 kg left .
Next week I will start training , going to mother -baby yoga : ) which sounds fun to me .
Its not always easy to go out for walks with Simon as the weather is so bad here with lots of rain .
I am positive I will get back into shape soon though and I am not too worried about it .
I enjoy to spend time with Simon and cant get over how time flies !
He is soon 6 weeks and its time for the first visit to the pediatrician soon : )
He is growing very well after loosing some weight initially as I had an infection a few days post partum and had to go back to hospital to get treatment with iv antibiotics ( Absolutely not what you wish for after delivering a baby but we got over it )
Our life has been turned upside down but I wouldnt want to change back for anything in the world as it is so much worth it to have little Simon in our lives .