I have been thinking about all the things that have happened in the lifes of the girls that first made me start this blog - " The fab five " .
The last two weeks have been extremely dramatic for all of us : good news and bad news , it has been about life and the biggest joy but also death and ttc and ttc on hold and broken dreams and hopes because of people who let down and dont keep their promise.
To begin with the fantastic news : One of us welcomed her much loved and awaited babygirl after losing triplet girls last year .
But we also had heartbreaking news :
One of us had her dreams shattered and heart broken again and lost her baby
and one of us has to face the dissapointment of a failed adoption of a child that was much welcome .
One of us has to put TTC on hold for one cycle because of a vaccination which may sound like no big deal but for someone who is TTC its very frustrating.
To my big surprise I will also contribute to the drama as I discovered that Im pregnant.
I feel so mixed emotions to say it in a time like this when so many hard things has happened to my friends but I decided I will just do it as it is a part of life as it is right now .
I feel happy but being a person that has experienced miscarriage I dont take anything for granted anymore and Im afraid to make up plans for the future but only live day by day.
And I subconsciously prepare my self for the possibility that I can loose the baby again¨.
I know I have a lot of work to do to handle this.
I wish it was different but its like a have a colud of worries hanging over me .
Im going back to my therapist after the holiday to discuss this as I know I might not bond with the baby if I dont get over it somehow. I try to be cautiously hopeful but its not the same as the first time.
Its yet very early ( week 4-5 ) so I have only told my husband and my brother and sister and Im not prone to tell anyone else yet .
I hope that this weeks good news (the safe arrival of Nans baby girl and my positive HPT ) will be a beginning of more good news to come soon from all of us .
I pray for everyone for peace , faith and hope and lots of joy and happiness in our lifes to come .
I want to thank you all for sharing your stories with me and for all the support you have given me .
Love you - Angie
oh beautiful, sweet angie i am so very happy for you, i understand that you may feel a bit weird about celebrating too loudly with all that is going on with your friends right now, i felt the same just by having a blog in the baby loss and infertility community. sometimes this good news helps to cheer others up though and gives hope . thank you so much for your comment abut therapy, i am in the process of finding a therapist, never seen one before but i know it will help me be the best i can for this new little one i am growing. i don't just have myself to think about now. i wish you a safe journey over these next 8 months. are you taking anything like pregnyl? progesterone or estrogen ? i am happy to be here along side you, sending love , anne xxx
ReplyDeleteHOORAY!!! What wonderful, wonderful news!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm with Anne, though--are you supplementing progesterone and estrogen? Not that I have any medical training WHATSOEVER, but I feel like if IVF protocols are to automatically supplement progesterone and estrogen early on, there's gotta be some benefit to it!
SOOO excited for you!!!!! HOORAY! HOORAY! HOORAY!
xoxoxo
Sweetest Angie,
ReplyDeleteSO VERY HAPPY to learn of your news! I will be holding you close to my heart and praying for you all the way to the finish line :) I'm glad we are getting some good news, despite the incredible pain that I feel for Shandrea and Deni. Go easy on yourself and know that we all love you and are rallying you on to success!
Send some of that baby dust my way ;) This is wonderful!
Much Love and Many HUGS
xoxo
ps thanks for thinking of me :)
Sending you hugs Angie. And know that I am truly happy for you and will be praying that all goes well. Be as happy as you can, because you deserve it. Love you sweet friend.
ReplyDeleteWhat amazing news!! I'm so happy for you, as I know you were struggling with the decision on how much further to go with treatment, looks like God answered that one for you!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm praying now that God will protect this little life, that He will bring him/her here safely, and that there will be more celebrating in 35-36ish weeks!! For another rainbow baby to be born. And I'm hoping that it is a beginning of a lot of good news for all of us! Definitely send that baby dust right on over to the states, specificially the south, as that's where the other 3 of us are!! ;) So much love to you and I know you're nervous, but don't let your worry keep you from enjoying something so special. And always be an advocate for yourself, if you think you need something--follow that gut instinct as I believe so firmly that God gives those for a reason!!
Praying you to the finish line sweet friend!!
Soooo happy to hear some good news from you! Keeping you in my prayers!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the little one. I will pray that he/she thrives. I just found your blog and will be following your story. Feel free to follow mine:
ReplyDeletehttp://jesstryingtoconceive.blogspot.com/
Blessings, Jess
Just stopping by to send you some extra love.
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