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Sunday, August 8, 2010

The hope is gone for this pregnancy

First I want to thank you everyone for stopping by and write me some words of comfort .
I warms my heart to know that there is people out there that understand and care and pray for me and wish me well .
In a world where miscarriage and infertility is still pretty much taboo  Im so grateful to have found so much support , this is something that all the money in the world cant buy , it makes me keep my hope when its really low .I dont know what I would have done without it .

Unfortunately  I have bad news as 2 days ago I started to bleed  and the bleeding continues so I miscarried again.
I feel tired and sad and numb .
I think life is so unfair , why cant I at least have one normal pregnancy ? And bring at least one healthy baby to this world?
I know we will try again as there is so much to gain by trying but right now I need to heal  both physically and emotionally .
I decided to take a week off work  as I  was supposed to start working tomorrow ( monday ) but I cant decide if I want to say that I had a miscarriage as I dont think I can handle questions and  other peoples reaction right now .
At the same time I dont like to keep it a secret because then I contribute to the taboo of miscarriage .
I think Im not strong enough to face questions and hugs and comments about it yet so I will probably not say  what happened yet.
I dont think I can go in to work yet as I feel I need some time to heal before I go back .


  1. Sweetest Angie,

    My heart is so heavy for you and Dave. No one should ever have to endure this once, and certainly not twice. None of us knows what is going to happen "next", but I remain faithful in our futures, yours and mine. As you say, this is not fair and enduring this again is cruel. So Cruel.

    However, I do know that you have FAITH and I also know that you WILL move forward and emerge once again from the sadness. But, for now, take time for youself to heal and feel the emotions that are surrounding you. When the time is right you can tell your colleagues what happened...when you feel strong enough to do so. Until then, take this time for you.

    More than anything, know that we are here for you, we understand and our hearts are broken for you. My ear is always open, please send me an email anytime and I promise to be a source of support.

    You have been such a beacon of light in my life Angie and I appreciate you beyond words. When your own life is crushed you still manage to send me words of comfort and be positive in my future. I want to extend the same to you, as that is what true friends do :) Only, I wish I could do it face to face and offer up the BIG HUG that you need right now.

    Look at yourself and know that you did everything RIGHT. You saught the advice of professionals, changed your lifestyle to include health and fitness and found a positive outlook. All which could not have been done without FAITH and strength. You are so strong my sweet friend. Please keep the faith and know that we love you beyond words.

    I am here for you...take care of yourself and know that I am praying for you always.


  2. My heart goes out for you Angie. To have something so precious and sacred as a baby growing inside of you, and then have it taken away, and also it being a second time, just doesn't seem fair.

    I've never been pregnant, just been trying for 3.5 years. I feel like I would rather not be able to conceive than be able to, and then lose the baby. I can't imagine the pain you must be going through.

    My advice would be to take the week off. Take time to heal, especially emotionally. Hold on to your faith and be strong. I'm praying for your healing.


  3. Oh Angie, I am so, so, sorry. My words will seem very small next to my feelings, so I just want you to know how very sorry I am and how I will hold your precious heart in prayer for strength and peace.

  4. Angie...I am just heartbroken to hear your news. Please know I am praying for you and your husband. Sending lots of hugs your way.

  5. I'm so sorry, Angie. I cannot begin to express anything that can eliminate the pain that you experiencing. Wishing things were different... Take care of yourself and do what's best for you in the days ahead.

  6. Angie,
    I am sending you so much love right now. You have been heavy on my heart and i have prayed for you. We will heal together. Take the time you need. Tell what you feel the need to when you feel the need to do so. But above all be good to you. Cling to and hug and love on hubby. It will get better my frien. Love you lots

  7. So very, very sorry. Praying for you and sending you love xoxo

  8. More love and prayers and hugs my dear friend....I sent you a few emails....Im so sorry, love to you xxx

  9. Oh Angie, praying for your strength and peace right now and that your hope and faith will survive this loss.

  10. I'm so sorry :( Praying for you