Again I want to thank you all wonderful ladies for caring to stop by and leave words of encouragement for me .
It means the world to me to read what you say, I know I would just be depressed and in a big mess without you .Your words makes me keep going and letting some hope in .
This blog has become a place where I come for comfort and for writing my thoughts as they are .
For the moment I live a " double life " as my husband wants to wait to talk to other people about this ( he didnt even talk to his family)
He wants to wait at least until we have been to the RE.
Outside I have to act as if this is not happening but inside Im in shock and want to talk about this .
Its comforting to " meet " people that understand ,its soothing for my soul to see those wondeful woman that have gone through IVF or are in the proces if it now ....makes it less scary for me .
It makes my heart lighter to get words of encouragement and prayers also from you that havent been through it but cares to stop by and give words of hope .
Its so special to know that there is so many beautiful people in this world that care .
It makes me keep my faith even if I often burst out in anger because of the burden I have to carry ( why me ? but then I have to think : why anyone ? why does people have to suffer? yes....thats the eternal question ...)
Tomorrow is the day we are going to see the RE , hubby and me are both tensed and have already argued ( it started with a trivial thing )
I have no energy to even cry but I think this argument is not deadly serious , I think we will get over it and go there tomorrow anyway.
I hope so much the RE will say that life style changes can improve the SCSA DFI levels so we can try the " natural" way but today I feel less negative towards IVF - If we have to I will do it .